When my first child was born, I took an unpaid three months off to care for him and to help my wife succeed in her career. ‘It's nice of you to help your wife with the baby,’ people would say, but I wasn't ‘helping,’ I was parenting. For three months, I was my son's primary caregiver, although sometimes (thankfully!) my wife would take time out of her workday to help me. He and I developed such a deep relationship that when my second child was born, I knew that I wanted bonding time again. This time my employer gave me four weeks of paid parental leave and I was fortunate to be able to afford another month off unpaid.